Thai Magic Charms
The Magic Phallus
Among the wide variety of Thai animist traditions, the magic phallus is one of the most
fascinating. A famous and easily accessable Thai spirit shrine, located at the rear of
Hilton International Hotel in Bangkok, displays hundreds of penis-shaped offerings --
miniature and humongous, abstract and anthropomorphic, artful and lurid. These phallic
offerings, known as balad kik or "honorable deputy dicks," are thought to
invoke powers of protection and success. In fact, a Miss Thailand World beauty contestant
hid one in her bouffant and was roundly chastised for creating an unfair advantage over
the other contestants! Small versions are worn around the waist on intricately woven
cords; larger versions are placed in auspicious positions in a business and bathed with
lustral waters and gold leaf to keep their magic potent. Some balad kik have been
blessed by revered monks and carry premium prices at amulet markets. Our sources assure us
that the amulets below will dispense unique vibrations that are guaranteed to absorb and
diminish any negative energies being directed, invisibly, towards your real family jewels.
- Monkey Amulet ($9.) -- Hanging brass
amulet of a monkey (4cm long) straddling a huge balad kik (magic phallus). The
monkey's erect penis is visible on the bottom of the charm (see photo at right).
- Crocodile Amulet ($10.) -- Hanging
brass amulet of a crocodile (5cm long) straddling a huge balad kik (see photo at
- Tiger Amulet ($11.) -- Hanging brass
amulet of a tiger (6cm long) straddling a huge balad kik. The tiger's erect penis
is visible on the bottom of the charm (see photo at right).
- Tiny Charms ($6.) -- Miniature animal
zodiac phallus-tipped charms (2cm long). Specifiy--HORSE, TIGER, GOAT, PIG, DOG, COCK,
MONKEY or RABBIT.
- Squirrel Amulet ($7.) -- Hanging
brass amulet of a squirrel (3.5cm long) straddling a huge balad kik tattooed with
Khmer magic script (see A in photo).
- Lucky Two-Tailed Lizard ($8.) --
Hanging pewter amulet of a lucky two-tailed lizard (4cm long) straddling an
anthropomorhpic balad kik with legs and tail, tattooed with Khmer magic script (see
B in photo).
- Six Penis Boar ($10.) -- Hanging
pewter amulet of a boar (3cm long) whose legs and tail are also pricks (!), tattooed with
Khmer magic script (see C in photo).
- Anthropomorphic Prick ($9.) --
Hanging pewter amulet of a balad kik with hind legs and tail (4cm long) , tattooed
with Khmer magic script (see D in photo).
- Big Pig ($12.) -- Hanging pewter
amulet of a hog (5.5cm long) straddling a huge phallus tattooed with Khmer magic script
(see E in photo).
- Two Fisted Charm ($13.) -- Standing
carved wooden monkey (5cm high) using two hands on its huge erect phallus. (see photo at
- Greeting Card $3. -- Standard sized
greeting card with envelope. On front: three types of penis charms. On the back: the story
of Thai phallic amulets with Thai and English translation for each charm. (see card front
- Magic Spell (add $3.) -- We'll
enclose any of these charms in a sexy Thai hunk greeting card and mail it to the person
over whom you'd like to invoke the charm's magic powers. Great for birthdays, but even
better for making love slaves!
The Cult of the Handsome Monk
There once was a young monk possessed of such fine and enticing features that it
created a great distraction at his temple among worshippers and priests alike. To prevent
further worldly and unsuitable imaginings, he allowed his lean and muscled body to become
flabby and pot-bellied in the hope of discouraging further disruption. Still,
face was so beguiling that his disciples continued to grow, threatening to overwhelm his
small temple. Finally, the monk was forced to cover his face with his hands whenever he
was seen in public, an act which only spread his fame farther and secured his immortality
in the following amulets and charms. This cult, for obvious reasons, is popular with gay
- Oval Amulet ($10.) -- Pewter amulet
(2.5cm high), with magical diagram incised on back (see front and rear in photo at left).
- Seated Monk ($9.) -- Pewter charm
(2cm high), with magical tattoo on back (see rear and front in photo at right).
- Spiral Monk ($9.) -- Pewter charm
(2cm high). Baroque version of seated monk with spiral cap, four pairs of arms covering
all bodily orifices including navel and anus, ornately decorated with snaking magic charms
on back (see front and rear in photo at left).
- Kneeling Monk ($9.) -- Pewter
charm (2cm high). Kneeling version with three pairs of arms covering face, ears and
stomach, with snaking magic symbols on sides and back (see rear and front in photo at
- Multi-Armed Monk ($9.) -- Pewter
charm (2cm high). A four-armed monk covering face, ears, geintaks and anus, with magic
symbols on back and bottom (see front and rear in photo at left).
- Greeting Card $3. -- Standard sized
greeting card with envelope. On front: seated monk amulet. On the back: the story of The
Cult of The Cult of the Handsome Monk. (see card front at right)
If you are interested to acquire one of these Thai amulets;